Bernadette's Vision

Love without condition is something I strive for continually. Throughout my life I've been challenged to love unconditionally. The call shows up in so many forms. As a human it's not the easiest thing to do.

In romantic relationships we are far from unconditional in our loving. In fact, we expect certain individual needs to be met in order to love someone. Romantic relationships are probably the least true expression of unconditional love. It's sad.

Do we love another when they are acting badly? Do we love another when we aren't getting our needs met? Do we love someone when they don't return that love in a way we feel it? I would have to say from my observations in myself and others that the answer is NO.


Our parents are human and they do things to us that we take so personally and turn our anger on them very quickly. Our lovers/partners forget things, ignore things and we immediately withdraw our love. Based on the expectations we have of these people in our lives, we choose to only them conditionally.

We can easily love our animals and children even if they do something that displeases us. Our kids inevitably yell the words "I hate you" at some time in their lives. They lie to us, they hide things from us. We still love them no matter what they do. Our pets destroy furniture, pee on the carpet and ruin some of our favorite things, yet we still love them.

Why do we allow our own expectations of others to rule our love for them?

Today I've chosen to express love unconditionally for someone who has done all they can to push me away. In their own self sabotaging way, they are refusing to accept that they deserve to be loved. In choosing to express love for this person regardless of the love they can or can't reciprocate is to choose unconditional love. Is it easy? Nope! It's really hard to detach from my own expectations and perceived needs. But, in choosing this rather then anger or abandonment I stand in a place that denies all selfish needs. It isn't a relationship that is toxic or harmful to me. In that case, I would love at a distance. It is one in which the person doesn't know how to receive love and isn't sure how to express it.

My hope is that in loving unconditionally, this person will feel loved, deserving or not. My purpose on this planet is to love and to teach. I can only teach what I know and can live. I've always believed you can't expect from others what you aren't willing to do yourself.

Are you willing to learn to love unconditionally?

2012(c) Bernadette Dickinson

__ Everyday our lives act as a mirror for us to truly see where we need to grow and where we need to give. Relationships provide a very personal mirror to the beliefs, attitudes and points of growth within us.

When things are flowing smoothly it’s easy to see beauty and express love. When things begin to become conflicted and full of turmoil we tend to blame others, circumstances and events for our unhappiness. During the times when things are challenging, we have the biggest opportunity to grow.

How others relate to us can be a very big mirror. When others seem hostile, angry or selfish we want to point blame. We in turn get defensive and can easily see their faults and faulty beliefs. How often do we stop our judgments of others and ask ourselves “What do I have to learn from this about myself”?

In romantic relationships we are quick to feel injured, rejected, abandoned and rejected when the object of our desire doesn’t respond in accord with our desires. In turn we withdraw, disconnect or retaliate. This energy only perpetuates our negative feelings and can destroy a relationship quickly.

Daily practice of mindfulness and meditation can create conscious and loving behaviors in you and in turn those around you.

When things around you begin to feel chaotic, overwhelming or just dissatisfying ask these questions:

            What am I projecting to others and my environment?

            What am I thinking about this situation or person?

            How can I change my thoughts and feelings about this to reflect love?

            What Am I really upset about?

            What can I give to someone else that I feel I am lacking?

When you begin to clarify how you feel, and shift to a place of love for yourself and others, you will instantly see a shift of energy. Sometimes that means allowing others to feel angry, sad or take time alone. Allowing others the freedom to express themselves fully is the ultimate act of love. If they are being abusive then it is up to you to stay a safe distance from them. Know you can’t change someone and accept you can only change yourself.

I will be posting communication techniques in upcoming blogs. Until then, Happy Living!!


Blessings,
Bernadette
© 2009 all rights reserved

This summer is flying by with so many new projects and things to learn. We  started back in April with building a new center bed for my Growing Dome. It  now houses a banana tree, strawberries, kale, garlic and various veggies. Aside from building a new outdoor pen for our chickens we had to rebuild a
roof on my outdoor barn. We converted it to a tractor barn and milking room.
In May I purchased 4 dairy goats and had to build two pens for them. So much
work but now that they are here it's unimaginable what life would be without
them. I've made cheese, ice cream, yogurt and soap. Next up is butter and cream
products.

Spirit inspired me 11 years ago to leave the City and move to the mountains.
 As we've been here I've been learning new skills. Before the industrial age
 people grew their own food, raised animals for food and dairy. With inflation
 out of control it is necessary to be prepared. For those who have followed my
radio show I've been instructing for many years to stock up on essentials. The
time has come for us to be self-sustaining.

The news globally is shocking to some. South America had a freeze a couple
of weeks ago that wiped out crops of fruit. The US bread basket is being hit
hard with strange weather and even strange disease. Europe is seeing heat waves and their food production is low. Globally we are hitting a place that if we
can't grow it locally, we won't be eating it. Volcanoes, fires, earthquakes
and strange weather are all common place now.. All this is aside from the global
financial collapse. We are watching things unravel daily.

The beauty of all of this is that we can override fear and take control of
our own lives. We can trust that the Universe has a plan, if we listen to what
we can and should do for ourselves and the planet we will rise above the all
things.

Right now we are each being called to decide our own fate. Do we continue to
live apathetically and rely on the systems that don't work to provide for us?
For me and my family we are taking control of our own fate and joyfully so!

Bernadette Dickinson ©2011

Last night on Hidden Wisdom Radio my dear friend Ric called in and shared his unique perspective on reality. Ric and I have had these conversations privately for many years. I thought it would be really special to have him on On Air so others could benefit. After a couple of years of poking and prodding it finally happened, Ric called in and had a "Live On Air" conversation. You can listen by going here and listening to last night's show about the Planet's 11th Hour.

To be in a place that you can squarely look at reality and what's happening daily on the planet gives one an internal perspective that is greatly needed. It is quickly becoming apparent that something needs to change or somethings going to give if we don't do things drastically differently. We have exceeded the use of planetary resources, polluted, exploited and destroyed all necessary parts of nature. It's time we become united as One with nature and each other in this delicate balance.

At this time of transition we are all being given the opportunity to deepen our relationship to self and to All That Is or God. In turning inward we will find eternal truth, peace and joy. Personally I've been gradually unplugging from more distractions. I turned off our satellite TV service, I'm moving away from social networking, spending more time meditating and enjoying life. Life meaning nature, love, family, gardening and appreciation of all that is natural.

As we get more in touch with ourselves, our ability to look at what's happening will improve. We will be able to not only see what's happening but respond in a peaceful, powerful way. We will see where we can personally change our relationship to nature and the planet. In turn we will find our own solutions for living differently and with greater appreciation for the delicate balance of life.

I hope we can all embrace Love in a way that extends to all living things, releasing all fear of the other or unknown. In a state of deep appreciation and love we can handle anything, move through anything and remain true to our own loving nature. This is a very exciting and monumental time on earth for humans. We can rise up and change our course, becoming self sufficient and respectful of nature, knowing that our choices are ultimately based on truth.

As discussed at the end of last night's show, have the conversation with yourself, others and choose to honestly, openly look at reality. As more people wake up to reality, we can bind together as One and make this a miraculous journey no matter what happens.

Blessings,
Bernadette Dickinson
(c)2011 All rights reserved