Bernadette's Vision

Next week, I will be doing a slide show video with tools and tips on Managing Life as an Empath.

_Did you wake up this morning ready to clean the Christmas mess? I got a head start and started cleaning last night. Our celebration was intimate and small so we didn't have much to clean. I just have to take the tree down but I'm enjoying the soft lights at night, so I may leave it for a week more.

As the year winds down it's time to think about your intentions and path for 2012. What you want, who should be there, where you want to go, all things to consider. For instance, I am determined to lose some 'Thyroid' weight and plan to do a Green Smoothie Fast as well as start a new workout routine.

Being clear on our intentions is mandatory if we want to create the life we desire. Start your list of priorities, values and intentions. Right before New Years Eve I will post a blog about what to do with that list.

For today, just start your list and add to it as the week progresses.

Blessings,
Bernadette

__ Everyday our lives act as a mirror for us to truly see where we need to grow and where we need to give. Relationships provide a very personal mirror to the beliefs, attitudes and points of growth within us.

When things are flowing smoothly it’s easy to see beauty and express love. When things begin to become conflicted and full of turmoil we tend to blame others, circumstances and events for our unhappiness. During the times when things are challenging, we have the biggest opportunity to grow.

How others relate to us can be a very big mirror. When others seem hostile, angry or selfish we want to point blame. We in turn get defensive and can easily see their faults and faulty beliefs. How often do we stop our judgments of others and ask ourselves “What do I have to learn from this about myself”?

In romantic relationships we are quick to feel injured, rejected, abandoned and rejected when the object of our desire doesn’t respond in accord with our desires. In turn we withdraw, disconnect or retaliate. This energy only perpetuates our negative feelings and can destroy a relationship quickly.

Daily practice of mindfulness and meditation can create conscious and loving behaviors in you and in turn those around you.

When things around you begin to feel chaotic, overwhelming or just dissatisfying ask these questions:

            What am I projecting to others and my environment?

            What am I thinking about this situation or person?

            How can I change my thoughts and feelings about this to reflect love?

            What Am I really upset about?

            What can I give to someone else that I feel I am lacking?

When you begin to clarify how you feel, and shift to a place of love for yourself and others, you will instantly see a shift of energy. Sometimes that means allowing others to feel angry, sad or take time alone. Allowing others the freedom to express themselves fully is the ultimate act of love. If they are being abusive then it is up to you to stay a safe distance from them. Know you can’t change someone and accept you can only change yourself.

I will be posting communication techniques in upcoming blogs. Until then, Happy Living!!


Blessings,
Bernadette
© 2009 all rights reserved

The energies of late have had me asking Spirit a lot of questions. Why has the energy been so erratic? Why one day it's so heavy and the next so light. Why do I have such motivation one minute and absolutely none the next.

Spirit has guided me into understanding that at this time things are changing. The changes at hand are creating more of a contrast. Partly so that we can become more aware of ourselves and awake to the polarity. In understanding life we must embrace the contrast of light and dark, good and evil, happy and sad, knowing they each originate with God or Source.

So much of our lives are eaten away by distractions and busy schedules. Many people are so busy they don't even know what they feel, think or want. As these energies bring about a more conscious awareness of the contrast we begin to connect at a deeper level with ourselves and each other.

Sometimes things have to magnify before we pay attention to them. It would seem this way in politics and reform. Many people don't pay attention to what is happening until it affects them. The food crisis, housing crisis and now healthcare are all things we pay little attention to until it affects us. For many years we've had a wonderful time enjoying plentiful days, now it's getting harder to simply "make it".

We are in a time of great contrast. In recognizing the polarity and contrast in our world and lives we are awakening to our own internal desires. As we see what is lacking we can then be more creative in manifesting our desires. We are also beginning to become aware of the connectedness of us all. The Oneness that affects all of us is important to understand. If one suffers, eventually we all suffer. If one succeeds, eventually we all succeed. As we see the contrast becoming more obvious, we will find new ways of relating to ourselves, each other and the Earth.

Our focus is changing as a species. We are looking for ways to benefit the whole of society not just ourselves. So as you continue to note the contrast, know it is there for you to shift your perspective. Find new ways of doing things, seeing things, and experiencing things. Then find ways to balance yourself knowing that all is coming into balance. As we recognize the extreme contrast we can also see that things are trying to balance themselves. We can help that process just in recognizing they are both good for us.

Blessings,
Bernadette
(c) 2010 all rights reserved

Many of us have been raised to believe that we must be responsible for
other people’s feelings. We were taught that in order to be responsible
we must always cooperate.

Cooperation is a very desirable characteristic. When a company or group
of people want to accomplish something, cooperation is essential. Each
individual must be responsible for an assigned task and cooperate with
the other team members in order to fulfill the desired outcome.

Sometimes in life however, we over-cooperate. If someone in our life
doesn’t follow through on things, we take on their responsibilities and do things for them. This over-cooperation ultimately leads to resentment and
blame.

We are solely responsible for ourselves. It is not our responsibility to
help others or to fix things for them. I am not saying that we shouldn’t
offer help to others, but that we should not enable others by doing things for them. What happens to each of us is ultimately our own responsibility.

Many people come to me about failing relationships, businesses, and
depression. During the first session I always ask, “Why do you think you
are going through this?” It always fascinates me how many people or
things we can blame for our own unhappiness. I hear everything from,
“It is my parents fault” to “My Sixth grade teacher told me I would never
amount to anything”.

Placing blame on others does not release us from our own responsibility.
I can say that it is my parent’s fault that I am horrible in relationships, but
it is still my choice to not change my behavior in relationships.
Likewise, when someone in our life continually makes excuses for not
fulfilling their responsibilities and asks us to somehow fix that, we are not
allowing them to learn their own lessons.

Children can’t learn how to walk if we constantly carry them around.
Adults can’t learn how to be responsible if other people continually do
things for them.

If I am in a bad relationship, it is not my partner’s fault. My partner may
not be the best or healthiest choice, but it is my own responsibility that I
continue in the relationship.

Happiness is a choice and a responsibility. We are the deciders of our
own fate. If something doesn’t make me happy, I choose not to do it. If I do something that makes me unhappy, I recognize that I chose to do it
and take responsibility for my own choice.